written @ 3:11 p.m. on September 12, 2002
The last few days have been an emotional diaster. Everything that could have possible happened has happend to cause me to be an emotional wreck. Most of what has happened has dealt with my love life and confused me out of my mind. I still am confused for the most part. I guess that is never going to change. I dont even know how to write everything that is going on. It would so caotic. Too many details and stories to follow that and i dont know if i want them all in here.
Yesterday was the first aniversary of the terriorist attacks that occured on September 11th 2001. Yesterday was just a blah day, it was like the earth was crying because it rained all day (due to the tropical depression i am sure). It was like the whole day had a HUGE damper put on it and when you thought you had all the rememberance of the day as you could stomach, you kept getting more. Dont take this the wrong way, I think remembering stuff like this is cool, but it isnt what i want to dwell on in six different classes, i would love to be able to move on and not have to worry about what may happen or what is to come. What happens happens and there isnt much that can be done about it. Even with all the high security people get guns and knifes and even bombs get through screenings. In spanish today and yesterday the topic of dicussion was world peace, well the only way to have piece in the world is to have piece in our own country and that isnt going to happend until people respect the decisions and choices of others. We say we arent racist but so many of us in the US are that needs to stop as well. Racism is a dirty word, and just because many muslism and peopl of arabic decent dont like the US that is no reason fo us to treat a whole nationality of people like shit, I mean that is not how we want to be treated and hten after we treat them like crap and then we wonder why they dont like us.
I just need to stop thinking. Thinking about everythign to such a deep extent is making things worse, especially with my love life. I feel like i really always hurt the people i care about so by caring for them i keep myself distance, and when an oppurtunity presents itself i dont take it. I have had ample oppurtunitys this week. I need to go ahead and graduate for the cluckers anonymous club. (Lauren: Can you believe that we havent graduated yet?)
Okay well i have to run i have some homeowrk to get cracking on. BLeh.
<3 Sara
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