written @ 6:17 p.m. on April 06, 2002
Life is always changing, for the good and the bad. This morning i woke up and was watching TV when the phone rings. It was Christa calling to tell me that she is flying to New York. I mean i had just seen her the night before. She was like my cousin Fritz, you know the one that is like my brother has been in an accident and they dont know what is going to happen. She was in tears on the phone i felt awful. I dont know exactly how to react in a situtation like that. Then i was like wow something like this could happen to anyone at anytime. It would be soo hard on me if someone that was like my brother was hurt and next to dying. As much as me and my brother dont see each other i cant imagine my life without him. I went through my friends and i was like gosh life would suck without them. I think that the person who i would prolly be most distrought over losing would be Ryan. Scary huh? I mean we fight all the time, but we have a love hate relationship, besides he is more like a brother than my brother is. If my life was to end today i want everyone to know what they mean to me. it isnt even the big things that i notice. For example today julie got out chap stick and was like dude here your lips are chapped. (i had mentioned that like 20 minutes before) Seeing that she remembered something so trivial means alot. I dunno why i mean i am weird like that, i guess it is cause it seems like i am not always paid attention to, because i dont nececarily have the most up to the second love life etc. Not that that matters because i have the absolute best friends ever. Never before have i felt like i could go to all of them and be like i have a problem. I want you everybody to know that even though they may not think that someones life is impacted by them and that noone will miss them when they are gone, but there is always someone whos life you have impacted and many who will miss you.
<3Sara