written @ 4:02 p.m. on November 26, 2001
Signs you've been in band too long...
When you hear music and start marking time
When you walk in step with the person in front of you
When you try to guess the tempo of your favorite song
When all of your friends are in band
When you don't mind changing clothes on the bus
When you point out key changes and
dynamics while listening to the radio
When every guy/girl you're interested in is in the band
When people ask you about your social life and you say, "Oh, you mean my flute/trumpet/ drum/etc.?"
When you consider your drill book a fashion accessory
When you've had a "trombone-ectomy"
When you practice your instrument more than you talk to your dog
When being mauled by a drum is a normal part of life
When people worry when they see you without your instrument
When "armed guard" means a girl with a pole instead of a guy with a gun
When band camp is FUN
When you respond to "band nerd"
When someone says the word "box" and you automatically put your head up
When you remember flats and sharps more easily than your name
When you dress the lunch line and urge others to do the same
When you're alone and you suffocate because there's no one telling you to breathe
When slides feel normal
When your instrument has a name
When you remember your instrument's birthday and forget your mom's
When making a line is your biggest accomplishment of the day
When marching backwards no longer reminds you of ballet
When you can make brown shoes look white
When your uniform fits
When black feathers become a fashion "do"
When you see your section more than you see your family
When you accidentally call you band director "Dad"
When you CAN sight-read
When you can put your uniform on in less than 10 minutes
When reeds taste good
When you think your plume is alive
When marking time is your favorite form of exercise
When you have a neck strap/harness tan line
When you subconsciously start practicing with a pencil
When numbers past 8 aren't important
When you're more opinionated about the Madison Scouts/Phantom Regiment rivalry than politics
When you roll-step through the cafeteria so you don't spill your lunch
When you'd rather practice than read this list
When letters past G aren't important
When you root for the other football team to lessen the time of your season
When you know everybody else's personal business
When you've practiced so long, the color guard is together
When you have no more secrets
When you don't try to hide the fact that you're in band
When you subconsciously start humming your music
When you know not only your own part, but everyone else's too
When you eat lunch with all of the other band people
When you start to eat lunch in the band room
When you can tell who's in the bathroom by looking at their sneakers under the stall
When you resort to humming your band music to fall asleep
When wide open spaces stir up and urge
to march your show
When you have a pin from every competition you've been to
When you have 2 instruments--a junky one for marching band and a good one for concert band
When dreams of marching are constantly in your head
When you can't go to the movies on weekends with your friends
When you don't see your parents on the weekends
When your free time is spent on homework
When the drummers actually start to make sense
When you wear your band shirt in public
When you have your friends call you to attention before you walk anywhere
When your furniture is dented from banging drumsticks on it
When you can make this list longer
When you get the jokes on this list
When you remember friends by chair number instead of name
When you don't remember your boy/girlfriend's birthday, but you
remember everything from your opener from your freshman year
When every time you drive by somewhere, you remember a band competition
When you can change on a co-ed bus and NEVER reveal anything
When you must always run to get to any sort of concession stand 1st (or the dinner table)
When members of OTHER bands send you band grams
When you can dance on the bleachers and NOT fall off
When you start learning to play stand songs on other instruments for more excitement
When you can strip out of your uniform in 5 seconds in order to get a stall in the bathroom before the crowds
When instead of an 8x10 school picture, on your mantel is a poster sized picture of the band
When you find a piece of a uniform and know who's it is by the number
When you know how to play 10 popular stand songs, yet don't know the words to any of them
When you learn how to sneak food under your hat to eat in the stands
When you have at least 5 different ways to fashionably put your hair up under your hat
When you actually take the time to put away your uniform and use hangers
When the highlight of you day is getting new band gloves with "grippies"
When you can carry 4 different food products at a time and eat them while standing up
When you wear your neck strap as a fashion accessory to everyday (non-band) functions
When you start finding practical uses for drummers; like foot warmers
When you spend free time cleaning up the band room for a free soda
When walking on mud no longer makes you slip
When you spend Sunday, your non-band day, adding more signs you've been in band too long to the list
When after you graduate you come back to help at band camp!
When you are CONVINCED your band teacher is the reincarnation of Satan
When you start break-dancing with the cheerleaders playing Louie-Louie
When you feel people don't come for the game, but the half-time show
When you're there at least 15 minutes early and leave 30 minutes late to make sure everyone has a ride
When the drummers actually look at the drum major because they are tired of looking at each other
When the guard is no longer cold at mid-season night game with nothing but a leotard on
When the spit from cold mouth pieces no longer tastes like spit
When you memorize the drummer's parts before your own
When you take the time to figure out how to play your band songs on the phone
When your non-band friends make up a soap opera based on your life in band
When you date someone outside of band, and people start to look at you funny
When your friends are able to tell you what instrument someone plays just because you talk about band so much
When you enjoy performing for freshmen assemblies
When the best thing that has happened to you in the four years of high school was getting your name announced as a band senior
When you spend your evenings rewriting music for underclassmen who can't play their parts
When you can remember every person and their instrument in band, but can't remember the 50 states for history class